26th July 2015

July 26, 2015 at 11:58 AM (Uncategorized)

The trip to the US almost did not happen. I was down with a vicious virus 4 weeks before D Day. We were at the doctor’s office the day of leaving trying to figure out if we should go. Pretty Chaotic and stressful! It cleared up a week before we left. The virus not only weakened me, but left me with complete exhaustion, a cough, and a decreased heart ejection factor (not sure if this is completely related to the Virus or the fluid build up, or ??).   We finally saw the doc and got the nod at 5PM for a flight next morning at 7AM.

Had a good trip. Some very tough days. The jet lag, level of activity and the cold in Chicago made it quite demanding. But we had a great host in Chicago (Marva, thanks!), an important time with Nisha. Glad to see Nisha. She graduates with a double major; a BS in Mathematics and BA in Economics from University of Chicago. The kid put herself through the wringer. Enough to say that she got a lot more out of her under graduate studies than I ever did! I am enclosing a terrific photo of us at the Chicago Millenium park in front of the bean

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cloud_Gate

The structure is just pure genius. The photo captures Amita’s and my feeling about the last 3 years. It was a shawshank redemption moment for us. 2 of us on a jail break escaping from a life sentence on the wings of all of our prayers and by digging a tunnel through the back of the hospital with a plastic fork that the hospital canteen supplies.

I had a terrific time with friends who visited us from all over to be with us. It was special. It made the trip full of love and hope.

My health is now ok. I came back and just sat still for 2 weeks. Did not move and let my body heal. Got rid of the fluid with some diuretics and because better and less exhausted. The medicines are playing a big part in keeping me going. We have to see where this leads and maybe treat the heart sometime in the future.

Musing

I have been doing some fascinating work. Have been studying spiritual texts and trying to apply it to practical life experiences. I feel there is a big hole in Eastern spiritual thought. The Gurus (Swamijis) have not been through these life experiences and are not equipped to bring it down to an experiential level. Most of their works are either stories of their wonderous lives or a discourse. We could do with some more practicality.

For example, the following narrative;

Turning adversity into resilience is hard. I was born with a deformity in the leg. I keep asking “why”.   The world is unfair. Life is hard.

Is dealt with practically in cognitive western psychology (Rational Emotive Behavioural Therapy) by disputing the above thinking and bringing some awareness, stability and positivity.

Alternate Belief System	Re framed or alternate Thinking
Own Your ExperienceExamine if you are blaming others for your thoughts. You give others all the power of If you blame others and loose the ability to take charge of your thoughts. Rewrite thinking that blames others and assume responsibility.   Be your master.	I have chosen to think that the world isunfair. I could have chosen to be angry, accepting, fearful etc.. but I have chosen this. This is one reaction that I have chosen from many others. I have the power to change this.
Cost Benefit AnalysisEvaluate the advantages and disadvantages of your   thought	There is no benefit to feeling sorry for myself. I need to look at this.
Survey MethodDo a survey to see if a certain belief is true or not	There are a lot more people worse of than me.
EvidenceIs your thinking factually correct	15% of the people in the world live with dis-ability. Normal people spend 10% of their life fighting dis-ability.   What is happening to me happens to others. There is only one part of me that is deformed. I also have great sight, hands , am intelligent.
Alternatives Almost all things that happen have multiple causes. Search for alternative thinking	Some people are born less intelligent. We do not call the deformed.
Worst ScenarioWhat is the worst that can happen
Useful ActionCan I do something now that is useful and helps me	Let me try to get on with my life. And be positive about myself. It is better than the alternatives.

 

I have examined the Gita, Buddhism, Advaita with a view to distilling their teachings. And I have tentatively found that they revolve around the following four concepts;

• I am the Infinite Universe/Who Am I / I am That / Losing personal identity/Not the Doer
• Universe is in me, the other and in everything / Being Non judgmental / Accept all
• This too will pass / Ever changing Universe/ In Action / Let It Be
• Freedom in Action / Renunciation from desires and results / there is no Good/Bad

 

I have gathered 60-70 experience by interviewing people and tried it on 50-60 such experiences and have been attempting to apply the above spiritual concepts to these experiences. For example, applying it to the narrative might look something like this;

Universe is in me, the other and in everything / Being Non judgmental / Accept allHow is this useful?	This is something that has been given to me. I am not going to feel responsible for this. And also I will not feel jealous of others who have normal legs.
Freedom in Action / Renunciation from desires and results / there is no Good/Bad Of what use is to give up expectations of fruits of my action	Can I give up my expectation to be“normal”. It will be nice to accept. But it is very hard. It will so nice to be running a round freely instead of hobbling around.But there is no use in fighting this.   It is going to be part of my life.   Fighting this or not accepting only makes it worse. I will need to quiet my mind when my mind starts complaining too much.
This too will pass Of what use is this to me now?	Not relevant …..
I am the Infinite Universe /Who Am I / I am That / Losing personal identity Of what use is this knowledge?	If I am the universe and the universe is the source of me; I will try to be kind to myself, knowing and feeling the infinite power/love/kindness of the universe.

 

An important question still remains. Most of us can buy into this intellectually, but it seems to be impossible to make it part of our lives. We seem to be falling into old patterns all the time.

There is no substitute for Awareness. It is the key when one is feeling hurt, fear, shame, anger etc… Awareness helps subside the patterns that make us unconscious and fall into the trap of sorrow and suffering, often without our permission, knowledge or control. This awareness often helps us see the universal fingerprint in me, the other, and most importantly in the event that is causing pain.   This leads to acceptance and action. Japa, Meditation, serving the less fortunate, Mindfulness, Satsang, Satvik Food, Prayer, Faith in a Guru etc.. strengthens the mind to deal with difficult circumstances. This is easiest when it is done when there is no pain and when the going is good.

These bring us to the doorstep of a remarkable fact. All these religious and spiritual beleifs are just that – a belief that builds another image of ourself. It is an alternate belief system that conditions us. As an important person in my life, Barry Kaufman, would say – juts adopt one of these to make your life easier. Nothing else. None of these are the divine gospel. Wear it like a jacket and change it when you feel like.

The magic is beyond.

It is inbetwen the words.

It is the silent background of life.

The unseen.

The infinite source of all manifest.

 

I love this simple write by a little known saint called Mooji

Everybody is invited to this bon fire.
Throw all your questions.
Throw all the answers as well.
Throw all your cares.
Have that much courage.
Say I have no time for answers anymore.
Put everything into this fire.
And do it now also.
This is the instant way.
Throw everything now.
No practice,
No philosophy.
But who can do it, you see?
Be willing to be completely empty.
Don’t even be a woman.
Don’t be a seeker.
Don’t be anything.
Don’t say any more prayers.
Don’t chant any more mantras.
Don’t go on any more pilgrimages.
Leave everything, because up till now even your seeking is an avoidance, another excuse of your mind not to discover the ever-present truth.
Our minds want to say a lot about truth.
But nothing it says is true.
You are here before the mind.
You know it’s ways.
This is why I say
throw everything in the fire right now.
It seems very drastic, my words,
but they are totally powerful.
Why keep walking around with the mind on your back?
Put him down and walk away free.

~ Mooji

Sharing

A magnificent counter point to the above is the following video. This is the line of thinking that says “I can do this” and “I am in charge of my destiny”. It is fun viewing.

https://www.facebook.com/DavidAvocadoWolfe/videos/10152493717896512/